Monday, January 16, 2012

It's not really that far.

A few time people have asked me why I live in Fife, and to be fair the answer was simply, if I wanted to own a house, it was somewhere I could afford to do so. People seem to have some odd ideas about how living outside of Edinburgh. "Is it not too far?" or "I'd hate all that travelling." Comments from my old manager about how he could never live outside the Edinburgh bypass as it's too far away. It started me thinking. I remembered when I lived in Leith briefly and was lazy and got the bus every day. It felt like it took an age some days. I wondered what it would be like getting to work if I still lived there, approx 2.5 miles from my place of work instead of the current 15 miles. 

Currently I get up at 06:45 and aim to leave at 07:10, usually fail and leave at 07:20. If I didn't use my biek I would need to leave at 07:10 to get a train that would get me in on time for starting at 08:00. Now if I lived in Edinburgh (According to Google Maps) to get from the Foot of Leith Walk to my workplace would take 52 mins walking and 31 mins by bus. Given I walk faster that what Google's appears to assume is an average walking speed of 3mph, I might shave off up to about 10 mins off that time and take about 40 mins.

So pretending I live in Edinburgh near the Foot of the Walk, I start at 08:00 and leave at 07:10 I would get in at 07:50, and be fair puggled but well exercised, if I left 10 mins later and got the bus, I'd get in at the same time. Now, if I leave my house 15 miles from Edinburgh at 07:20, cycle  to a train station (1.5 miles), get the train to Haymarket and walk to the office, I get in at 07:55. If I leave at 07:10 and walk to a different station (0.75 miles), get a train to Haymarket, I get in the office at 07:55.

For simplicity, here it is in a table.



So um, yeah all that travelling? It probably takes me less time for me to get to work than a lot of folks in the city. 6 times the distance and not so different journey times? That really is fucked up.

Friday, January 13, 2012

The natural order of things.

For years it has never really bothered me, it was only recently that I started to get bugged by it. In the age of "shuffle" and mp3s, I find myself increasingly listening to whole albums in their intended order. It's not that they sound "wrong", but it's not "right" either, the songs don't seem fit and flow together as well as they should. I find myself purposely putting albums in the CD player as opposed to listening to them through iTunes or on my phone. It might sound silly but it seems far easier to skip a track on iTunes or my phone, usually because it's in front of me, the CD player on the other hand is on the other side of the room.

Shuffling songs isn't like making a mixtape in the days of old, when you'd carefully put together songs which flowed well, I learned much from this, I still have all my mixtapes, some just by one artist, I can pick some of the up and wonder what the hell was going on in my mind when I made certain selections, others I've actually dug out years later and stuck in the tape deck because those were the ones that work, they still fit together because I'd got it right. It may not be in context with the album it's from but it mixes in well into a "new" album if you like.

Mixtapes are one thing but back in albumworld I think we're in danger of losing the idea that context is important. Out there in Major Label land, I read an article about how the album is becoming less important, record labels are trying different deals like signing someone for so many songs instead of 3 or 4 albums, they see music as being a consumable item and that it seems to becoming disposable and throwaway because society seems to be moving that way. They want to get the big selling single. It's rather tragic. While some of these will actually be good pieces of work, the will also be a lot chaff. I inhabit a completely different world from these people, I like digital music, but if I can get a physical CD, I'll quite happily opt for that, most of the bands I listen to are either on their own or small labels, very few are on big labels any more. I prefer things this way, it's nurturing talent and allowing for natural development so artists aren't fast tracked and seem as commodity generating money for someone else.

The Cure's "Friday I'm In Love" is a great pop tune, but listening to it alone, it's out of context, you don't have the 11 other songs on the album "Wish" which surround it. It's not that the song doesn't stand up on it's own, it's that the listener is missing out on a whole atmosphere/world that the song belongs to. I think it's far too easy for people to pick and choose individual tracks from music websites to buy, as it means they could be missing out on some of the best (or worst) music. They could be potentially be missing out by not experiencing something and thus not expanding their horizons. How often have you listened to an album and perhaps not been that keen on a song, but it slowly that song grows on you because you listen to the whole album without skipping tracks, and find it has become one of your favourites? I feel most people in our modern world don't have the patience or inclination to sit through a full experience of something, they want to pick and choose individual moments, that they know they will like and be worse off for the experience.

Anyone got any thoughts they'd like to share on this?

Thursday, January 12, 2012

Riding the creative wave

This has been an odd week, I've been feeling more creative than usual, it was sparked by me re-working the old material in my last post, oddly I wrote some song lyrics that just seemed to come easisly and flow well. They'll need music to accompany them, but I am actually please with them.

I often wonder about what I come up with, if people will like it or not, I know I like it. A couple of the songs my old band stopped playing were because I didn't want to do them, I knew at the time they were fit for purpose, but personally I was not happy with parts, and it was things that re-writing wouldn't fix. So they ended up dropped from the set. It's nice if someone like's a song, but I don't feel that I need people like it, I just expect them to tolerate it without throwing half bricks.

With my old band I never set up to be a 'comedy' band, it was just that I find it far easier to write things that are either scathing and sarcastic, or are amusing, it's not a deliberate thing. We did music we liked and was generally upbeat and had lyrics that were funny. That doesn't make it a comedy band, though there's nothing wrong with that. Though I do wonder if some of the others felt they wanted to be part of something more serious. I really should get my finger out and work on more new material but also re-visit some of the old stuff, as I'm not really to can some of it yet.

2008 was the last time I played in a band. This year is when I do so again.

Tuesday, January 10, 2012

5 years on...

I've been giving an airing to some tunes I made over 5 years ago, they were experimental electronic ones that formed a collection called Blue-oo-sound. The 'oo' came from me just randomly assigning each track a letter with 'oo' after it, not the most ingenius idea, but it did the job. Each had a different low frequency tone droning away in the background, and the idea is that depending on the frequency of the tone it will mimic alpha, theta or delta brainwaves. I dug them out because they're being submitted to a collective known as 'The House Above The World'. I've been checking the levels on each track, adjusting the mix, until I was happy with each one. I'm also currently knocking together some cover artwork for this project. If all goes to plan it should see the light of day at the end of the month.

Friday, January 6, 2012

2012: Getting organised?

I stumbled across MindBloom today - "A life game" to improve my life, if you believe the spiel. So I created an account and logged in. To give you the gist, it's a tree with up to 7 leaves, you can choose the leaves you want, each represents an area of your life, career, spirituality, relationships, finances, health, lifestyle and creativity, you can set yourself tasks in each area, and the idea being that as you "grow" so does the tree. It's an attempt to build a life organiser. It's a novel idea, but it no doubt will suffer from what blogging does, apathy once the user has gotten through that initial enthusiasm. It does allow you to link to friends, I assume it will do this either via FB or your email address, depending on how you've signed up to it, not entirely sure though.

I've signed up to give it a go, I may actually get round to doing all those little things I keep putting aside, sticking them in a list and having a website/iPhone app nagging me may just be what I need to start being less lethargic and lazy.

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

2011: My Year In Music: Album Reviews

At the end of December for the past few years I have seen people regularly posting their music/gig review of the year, usually with their favourite albums of the year. I only ever seemed to manage the odd one or two, and if I was lucky they'd actually been released in the that year, as opposed to me either finding something I'd never heard before, or stocking up on back catalogues. This year however has been a year where this has changed!

If you've accidentally stumbled across this thinking you'll find positive words about masters of blandness Coldplay, I'm afraid you're going to be sorely disappointed, however if you'd like to read some half baked opinons about album's you've never heard of, by bands you're just as likely to have never heard of then, feel free to indulge.

I've seen less gigs this year, but I've been impressed with the quality of what I have seen, The Lovely Eggs, Kid Canaveral, Kunt and the Gang, Tim Ten Yen, The Frank & Walters and Carter The Unstoppable Sex Machine. Oh I also saw Morrissey but I was really unimpressed with the sound, whether it was the venue or Moz's setup, it's not entirely clear. However enough waffle about that, it's time to get on with reviewing albums. The albums have been arranged in no particular order.

I don't claim to be good at writing reviews, which is why one of the reasons I've stuck plenty of videos into this post, please give yourself about half an hour to sit down and read this and watch the videos. I hope you enjoy this and hopefully I've caught all the typos when my brain was miles ahead of my fingers.

Brilliant! Tragic! - Art Brut
The last Art Brut record Art Brut vs. Satan two years ago ended up being one of the main soundtracks in a particularly chaotic phase of my life.. Brilliant! Tragic! like the previous album was produced by Black Francis and the art work was  by Jamie McKelvie. With the heartfelt plea of 'The record buying public shouldn't be voting' on Demon's Out from the last album  I wondered what lyrical gems would be unearthed this time around? A smile is raised half way through the first song.  'Clever Clever Jazz' about playing your first gig to a small unfriendly heckling crowd. "Stop shouting play what you know! Let us get on with the show, Clever Clever Jazz band, we're working in a genre you don't understand!" war cries Eddie in his distinctive voice. It may surprise you to learn that this time round that Eddie's voice is different on some tracks however Black Francis has been teaching Eddie to sing in whispery tones, which resulted in the sublime single 'Lost Weekend'. A song I've been compelled to stick on a loop for over an hour and still wanted to keep listening to it after.

Lost Weekend - Art Brut


As I continue the trip through the rest of the album it feels a bit less together than Art Brut vs. Satan. It feels like there at lots of varying moods involved or that there's been a shift in mood as the songs have been written particularly the last two tracks. This is in no way a bad thing, but I was something I noticed. Art Brut tackle an wide range of subjects throughout the album such as Axl Rose, Eddie dying and (in a seperate song) a girlfriend getting friendly with, then leaving for a 'Bad Comedian', with Eddie checking the bloke out on social media sites. The lines "How can you bear to hold his hand? I bet he signs his name in Comic Sans!" make me smirk.. On this album Art Brut musically feel like they're progressing happily along their chosen path while lyrically Eddie's wit and observation seem to be bang on, yet continue to be simple and straight forward without trying to be overly clever. While Eddie's vocals may be an acquired taste for some, they've made a good mix of his usual and new vocal styles.  Art Brut are back and continuing to do things their own way. If only more bands would follow this example.

http://www.artbrut.org.uk

Fuck You! I'm Keith Top Of The Pops - Keith Top Of The Pops and his Minor UK Indie All-Star Celebrity Backing Band
Let's start by understanding who Keith's Minor UK Indie All-Star celebs are. The band line up for this album includes the following people Keith TOTP, Mikey Drums, Fruitbat, Jimbob, Eddie Argos, Jasper Future, Ian  Catskilkin, Simon Indelicate, Julia Indelicate, Sarah Nixey, John Moore,  Luke Haines, Charley Stone, David Barnett, Sue Denim, Dee Plume, Jackie  McKeown, James Rocks, Micky Ciccone, Adie Nunn, Sara Saw,  Dave Fade,  Johnny Fade, Dyan Valdes, Keith Murray, Chris Cain, Arec G Litter, and  Tim Ten Yen from the following artists - Carter The Unstoppable Sex Machine, Art Brut, The Blood Arm, Everybody Was In The French Resistance...Now!, The Indelicates, Black Box Recorder, The Auteurs, Jim Bob, Abdoujaparov, Luke Haines, Mr. Solo, David Devant and his Spirit Wife, The Fades, The Helmholtz Resonators, Tim Ten Yen among others. Keith's has been described as being notably influenced by Half Man Half Biscuit and the live performance features as many people as playing as many instruments as possible as far as I know I think he's had 7 guitars at once, along with saws, clarinets, etc.

Getting back on track, the album kicks off with head nodding ditty 'Girl' a song about Keith's ex who he doesn't like very much. Keith shows his humorous side with 'Pretentious Title TBC' - "I only read books by dead authors, beat poets, lesbians, autistic auteurs. I'd rather help lead a stray dog than a bull. At least they won't try moving next door.' You do wonder what parts are mock arrogance. Some songs would make wonderful sing-a-longs such as the joyful ode 'Two Of The Beatles Are Dead'. It's not all comedy, there are quieter, sincere moments such as 'Try Your Best' and 'What's On Your Mind?' which will strike a chord with anyone who's dealt with moody people who won't talk about what's bothering them and take it out on others. Keith also let's rip about moving to London and discovering all these gigs full of shit bands, bands who copy looks and sounds and end up fairly weak on 'I Hate Your Band' - "You're just ripping off... "  he emphatically yells several times towards the close of the song, thing is he's right.

Keith may sing "Your opinion doesn't matter 'cos your not me." My opinion is wondering why you haven't got on-line and ordered this yet? Buy his album  on CD/Vinyl/MP3
http://corporaterecords.co.uk/artists/Keith+Top+Of+The+Pops+&+His+Minor+UK+Indie+All-Star+Celebrity+Backing+Band/Fuck+You!+I%27m+Keith+Top+Of+The+Pops+-++Special+Ed

Björk - Biophilla
I'm used to comments such as 90s throwback from Mr Howie, anyone who takes the time to rumage through my music collection will see that it's far more diverse than that, yes I was very much an early 90s person, that was the time I got into music. I always look forward to a Björk album. Back in the early noughties I started getting into Björk, it's an example of an artist I didn't like and couldn't get into. Oddly that changed when I picked up a copy of Debut as I liked one of the songs on it, it started a liking that's grown over the years, so a new Björk album was eagerly anticipated, the theme of the album is the cosmos. The first time I heard it, it seemed to be an album that's hard to penetrate, the songs are pleasant enough, but I can't find an occasion where I want to listen to this album. I like it, but I don't want to listen to it, it doesn't seem to fit into my life. When cooking? It doesn't feel right. When chilling out perhaps? No,  it's not right for that either. How about wandering to and from work, or sitting on the train? Again no, I just want to hit the next button when it comes on. I can't find an appropriate mood for listening to this album. However upon re-listening to this album the dischord appears to be down to me "remembering" only the songs which have disjointed sounds, sounds that don't fit or make me cringe, the culprits are Thunderbolt, Dark Matter an  Hollow. These songs create a horrible un-nerving feeling in me, so much so I am compelled to skip past them. Ingoring these I find can happily work, read or just put it on in the background and relax to it and the sense of disappointment that originally felt evaporates. Musically this is Björk continuing in the direction she's been heading for years, I only hope the aspects of dischordant cacophany in this album are not Björk's final destination.

Crystalline - Björk


http://www.bjork.com

Cob Dominos - The Lovely Eggs
Following from 2009's 'If You Were Fruit', The Lovely Eggs are back with 'Cob Dominos' and happy to let us know it with the first single off the album the kick-in-the-face-tastic 'Don't Look At Me (I Don't Like It)'. This album has much pared down arrangements compared to their debut, here it's mainly drums and guitar and they prove resourceful with it. The material is great fun, songs about simple, straightforward everyday things. 'Panic Plants' for example, is about worrying about leaving the oven on when you go out, and similar things that will niggle at the back of your head. There are several songs around or under a minute, they don't feel like they're just been thrown on, but funny ideas that you know will never translate into a full songs, such as 'Pets' but they fit in just fine, and you wonder why more people don't do this? The highlight for me is 'Watermelons', fast, upbeat, happy and it's got a Kazoo on it. You can't go wrong with Kazoos as Kunt and the Gang can attest to in their live set. There is one song on this album that I just can't warm to and that's 'Hey Scraggletooth', and that's probably due to the title conjouring up a vile  image that is far too vivid and cringeworthy for me. That aside, just buy this album. You will not regret it.

Don't Look At Me (I Don't Like It) video (feat. John Shuttleworth).


New single: Allergies (This track is not on 'Cob Dominos')


Hurry Up And Suck Me Off Before I Get Famous - Kunt and the Gang
Mr Tuppence strikes wanks again! Kunt and the Gang is one of those artists that people will see the name and assume it will just be shit or not as funny as people on the internet make out. This is Kunt's 4th "proper" album, the 3rd album 'One Last Wank and One Last Cry' was released back in 2008, since then he's released a couple of compilation albums, one a best of, the other of double album of rarities, there's also been a musical: Kunt and the Gang presents... "Shannon Matthews the Musical". This time round we bouncy, perky keyboard driven songs about oral sex, wanking, faecal fun and premature ejaculation, in other words it's business as usual. You may wonder how someone can make a career last this far powered largely by obscenity and swearing? With Kunt it's not just filth and (self) abuse, in addtion what you get are witty, well observed and clever lyrics combined with melodies and catchy choruses that will hook into your brain for days on end. He finds a way into your head against your will and he likes it. The latest release is no exception.

Since the tail-end of last year, Kunt's started an infrequent YouTube sitcom "Peverts on the Internet", a couple of the songs from this turn up on here, the title track 'Hurry Up...' and my current earworm 'If In Doubt Get Your Corey Out' both feature, and both are self explanitary, unlike 'Bangers and Mash' which you could mistakenly think was, instead it's a humorous tale of toilet ettiquette and worrying about how to explain away a cubicle situation that's not of Kunt's making.

'My Homless Friend' - Kunt and the Gang


There's a pleasant surprise this time round as there's a bit of a departure from usual subjects and we have Kunt expanding his horizons and dipping his cock into moist new territory with songs like 'Paul Stevenson's Party' - the hilarious tale of a chaotic house party Kunt went to in his youth that gets overrun while the parentals are out of town. 'My Homeless Friend', a song about Kunt being a minor internet star and meeting ones of his old friends who is now homeless and comparing their lives. There's also 'Teach Your Kids To Smoke' and 'Let's Fuck About With Fireworks' a fuck off to health and safety. It's a brave move into new areas and it's ones that proves funny and fruitful. The album's rounded off with '50 Things You Should Think About To Stop You Doing Your Beans' a song that is in the same vein as 'For A Million Pounds' but shorter and more sedate and I can't help but wonder if this is intended to perhaps displace the latter in the live show? If you want to take a look at Kunt and the Gang material beyond his minor internet hits compilation album 'Complete Kunt', this is a great place to start.

 This year's Christmas single from Kunt and the Gang - Jesus (Baby With A Beard)


http://www.kuntandthegang.co.uk

90 Bisodol (Crimond) - Half Man Half Biscuit
There's a dimension somewhere out there where Half Man Half Biscuit rule the charts, are revered by all and get the credit they deserve, sadly it's not in the dimension in which we exist. My first experience of Half Man Half Biscuit was CSI:Ambleside, an album that made me question how on earth I had never got into this band before, for a band that's been around since the early 80s that's quite a feat. This album feels like they've raided their own back catalogue for sounds, so musically it has the feel of a 'Best Of' Half Man Half Biscuit album. There's nothing wrong with that but 'Descent of the Stiperstones' is revisiting CSI:Ambleside's 'National Shite Day' and while very a much a spoken word track set to music, sadly this it's not as funny. This quickly remedied by 'Left Lyrics In The Practice Room' by driven by an Achtung Bono 'Restless Legs' or 'Joy Division Oven Gloves' style jaunt. This album doesn't feel as quite strong and together as CSI:Ambleside although it manage to hit the lyrical standards you'd expect from Half Man Half Biscuit in the lyric department. The resulting product is a solid Half Man Half Biscuit album you'd be happy to play to your parents, even though it may not be their strongest, it  is certainly very welcome.

Green Naugahyde - Primus
The only band to that crops up as a genre in various pieces of media software. Terms like 'wacky' and 'comedy' are often applied to Primus which seems slightly unfair when terms like 'innovative' should be applied in the same sentence. 1999s 'Antipop' was the chemotherapy that wiped out the memory of 1997s cancreous 'The Brown Album', this album firmly re-establishes their position after a 12 year hiatus. Primus are not just re-invigorated, they're revitalised and are hitting the ground running, Les Claypool's bass is as zany as ever yet still providing a solid base for the songs. Part of this is due to the band's original drummer (before they got signed), returning to the fold and pushing some the boundaries and encouraging them to play songs they rarely or never played live. I'm glad of this because you can hear the enthusiasm along with a new found maturity throughout the album, there's less 'comical' observations than previously 'De Anza Jig' or 'Wynona's Big Brown Beaver', however this doesn't mean they don't know how to have fun. The songs all slot together nicely, even having revisited subjects they've used many times before like drugs : 'Jilly's On Smack' they continue to tell new tales that don't bore us. They've written another chapter to the Fisherman's Chronicles, Part IV: 'Last Salmon Man'. With this album Primus are like the man who went away for many years and has just walked back into his old local and everyone who thought they'd never see him again are very much glad to see him return.

Tromsø, Kaptien - Robyn Hitchcock
A solo offering from Mr. Hitchcock this time around. Many of the songs are influenced by Norway, in fact this was recorded in Norway and even features Robyn singing in Norweigan on the final track. Here we kick of with 'Light Blue Afternoon' a perky little Beatles influenced number, before lapsing into a re-working of 'Raining Twlight Coast' from Robyn's Eye album. The material here is fairly upbeat, even in song with titles like 'Dismal City' or the mellow tones of 'The Abyss' have a vein of upliftment running through them. The album is rounded of with a Godnatt Oslo, a Norweigen version of 'Goodnight Oslo', the arrangement of which has also been altered to so it fits better with the other songs on the album.



http://www.robynhitchcock.com

The Life Equation - Akira The Don
My first encounter with Akira The Don was back at the end of 2005, I'd gone to a gig in London and he was the support act. I wasn't sure if I wanted to like or hate him, I wasn't particularly into rap, but this bloke both rapped and sang in a weird yet alluring combo. He seemed genuinely happy and cheerful and it didn't seem put on, which seemed unnerving. It was his song 'Clones' that sampled the Alice Cooper song of the same name and also used the chorus, and 'Thanks For All The AIDS' a rant against ignorance, that stuck in my head. Six years later I ended up buying 'Clones' off his website, I got sent a copy of his album 'The Omega Sanction' whether it was a mistake or a kind gesture I'm not sure, but I had a listen, loved what I heard and that drew me back to the website to buy more, then discovered his entire back catalogue of his own material and his 'mixtape' archive was available to stream live. I ended up buying all the available CDs one of which was his latest album - 'The Life Equation'.

This particular album describes itself as "Album of the Year" and I agree 100% with this bold claim.

I stuck it on when I had a long car journey and because I couldn't swap cds while driving I'd left it on, so the CD looped 3 times, and I was pretty much hooked on it. Any poor person who saw me on the return journey would have seen some daft bloke singing 'We Are Not Alone' while driving along some mad diversion through Dumbarton. You need to learn now that Akira The Don is not scared of sampling and produces some pretty damned good material by doing so, it's also worth mentioning that the album's produced by Stephen Hague. Akira strikes a balance between singing and rapping and it works amazingly well. It's pop/rap crossing over Jim but not as we know it. How to describe it? Well there's videos below which should show you the depth and diversity of Akira The Don's material and talents.

I Am Not Dead (Yeah!) - Akira The Don


Babydoll - Akira The Don


Nothing Lasts Forever - Akira The Don (New Single)


'The Life Equation' itself is a 13 and a half minute masterpiece,  several tracks all built into one, it's a bit like a novel of short stories beginning with 'In The Morning' before moving into,''Antilife' then' 'A Cautionary Tale' an seemingly autobiographical tale of getting caught smoking weed in public, before completely changing topic and wandering into 'I Don't Own A TV' which samples Squeeze, and extoles the virtues of, and encourages you to not own a TV:  "Who puts food in the fat man's gut? Who turns your daughter into a slut, namanamanamanama I should warn you, it's that black box sitting in the corner". Before crashing into the speedy 'Jesus' - "was a lovely bloke, but I ain't seen him lately" and crashing into 'Ave Satanus' and drifting into a reprise of 'In The Morning'.

Listen to the album on-line here: http://akirathedon.com/music/albums/the-life-equation/

As for the rest of A.K.Donovan's compilation albums released this year I picked up here's links to each with favourite tracks.

Living In The Future - Akira The Don
Jamie, Living In The Future 2, Steven Wells (He Was The Greatest)
Listen here: http://akirathedon.com/music/albums/living-in-the-future-lp/

The Omega Sanction - Akira The Don
The First Day Of Spring, 18,
Listen Here: http://akirathedon.com/music/mixtapes/akira-the-don-the-omega-sanction/

Thieving - Akira The Don
Werewolves!, Giro, Jesus, Security
Listen here: http://akirathedon.com/music/mixtapes/thieving-2/

Stunners 130 - Akira The Don & Wade Crescent
This is a mashup album, unfortunately I'm assuming due to copyright, he can't stream it off his website.

The first album - When We Were Young
Clones, Thanks for All The AIDS, (Oh) What A Glorious Thing!
Listen Here: http://akirathedon.com/music/albums/when-we-were-young/

http://www.akirathedon.com

Thursday, November 24, 2011

Feeling Festive?

It's November, the shops have got their Christmas displays out and there will be guaranteed to be someone making a statement about how it is too early for such things and how there should be a law which prohibits any mention of Christmas outside of December. It happens every year, it's not very in the spirit, but what is the real meaning of Christmas these days?  When I grew up this is how it went. I was taught that's it the birth of Jesus Christ our apparent saviour, who was born in a barn to a virgin called Mary, who's husband Joseph accepted this as a miracle. If Mary lived in this day and age and told Joseph why she was pregnant, he may well have beaten Mary to find out who had shagged her and may have tried to "solve" the pregnancy by failing to prevent her from falling down, then back up some stairs. Then again the Joseph of now might just walk off, or he may even have compassion and forgiveness and be prepared to stand by Mary? Even though the story is easily unbelievable, if we don't look cynically at it, we see Joseph accepting what his wife tells him and is happy about it, we see kindness in the form of being given somewhere, though the inn-keepers could have given up their room to a pregnant woman, that aside there's more kindness in the form of the gifts from the three wise men.

Move on several years, as I got older we learn there are various forms of Christianity some more strict than other. There were also many other religions in the world, and that some people chose to have no religion at all. I see that there are common themes running through the religions yet there are minorities from all of these religions will aggressively argue that their one is "correct" and all others are "wrong", even some of those who choose not to believe in a religion are just as capable of behaving like this. Out of all this this I discovered that pre-Christian Germanic, Roman, and Celtic people celebrated the Winter Solstice. As Christianity was becoming more popular, they introduced their celebration which is widely believed to integrate into the existing solstice celebrations and drive a shift towards their own celebration. This was one of the more amiable interpretations, in some cases the use of phrases like "The Christians stole Yule" and implying that the aim was to wipe out the existing Pagan religion and replace it with their own. I don't know specifically how it was implemented because I wasn't there, and I bet you weren't either. Though I can accept that Christmas was merged into the existing festivals in an underhand way of promoting Christianity. What is interesting however, is that the winter solstice itself survived as a festival, even though it's greatly overshadowed, many of its ancient traditions have also survived through the ages.

From nobeliefs.com

    The use of holly, mistletoe, yule logs, wassail bowls, and decorating a tree derived from early pagan customs. Many European countries still call this celebration "Yule-tide" meaning "wheel time," the cycles of time. None of these derive from Christian origin.


That's where Christmas and some of the traditions are rooted. To be honest I'm not always entirely sure how I should feel about Christmas. It would be easy to get annoyed to hear the hypocrisy of Christians complaining about how Christmas has become commercialised and that's not what it's about, especially since you could ask what right do they have to do this, since they went and tried to change an existing festival for their own means. It was however at least 1500 years ago and people now are not responsible for the actions of their ancestors.

In the eyes of many there is only one winter festival for them, for the vast majority it's Christmas. Is Christian element of Christmas being reduced down to a fairytale and some decorative imagery? How many people believe in the religious aspect of Christmas? For the past few years, I've constantly heard people (of no specific religion) that Christmas is too commercial. I'd like to know what they're doing to change it, because I don't see them make any effort to do so. Maybe it's because they'd be labeled killjoys for doing so? Maybe they are seeing what many can't, that it's become so commercial because the meaning of Christmas has become diluted over the years, and the religious aspect no longer taken as seriously?

Here's my idea, why not have one day of the year where the world can shut down for a day, and people are nice to each other, give gifts if they want, and use it to serve as a reminder than the world is a horrible place sometimes, but it's families, friends working together that make it a much better place, I'd like to see it incorporate every single person performing least one random act of kindness, whether it is helping that pensioner across the road, giving stuff to a charity shop, buying a Big Issue or giving it a few more days before throwing a brick through some poor bugger's window.

Kids should be taught the real origins of Christmas. Kids love nativity, the rest of us are probably bored to tears by it. I know was bored of it by the time I was seven or eight. They should be taught about all the winter festivals, and they should also learn that Christianity was imposed on the winter festivals but it picked up a lot of traditions from them on the way. Also make sure to teach them carols, they're fun! Everyone one loves 'Jingle Bells' and 'Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer', they tell you they don't then they're lying. These songs are bright and cheery and reflect that this time of year should be happy. It is also a time for embracing tolerance so no matter what religion people are they should be able to be happy, tolerant, kind and try to be less selfish. In an ideal world it would be a non-religious festival, that's not going to change, however what's to stop it evolving into something bigger and better? Creationists I presume, but the rest of us? We've better things to do than have petty beefs, let's give an additional meaning to the winter festivals: "Look after each other and don't be a cunt." It's not the catchiest, but at least it's heartfelt and honest.

Given all the recent hoo-haa over Armistice Day, I'm wondering how many "if you don't like Christmas, go back to yer own country" comments we see springing up between now and Christmas, and how many of these people will ever realise the person they're telling to go home is already home because this is their country too?  If you want Christmas to be religious, make it so, if you want it to be something else, go for it. All I ask is that people are united in looking out for others over the festive period and where possible to exercise a little more kindness.